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Posts Tagged ‘Mark Wahlberg’

I’m not the only one who thinks Max Payne is going to be kickass, right?

Forget The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and Revolutionary Road, this is what I want to see. Will it have the world’s greatest plot? Of course not. Will the dialogue blow my mind? Hell no. Does it have copious amounts of guns, things blowing up and Mark Wahlberg being sulky? Oh, yes.

I’m so there. This thing is gonna be awesome! The only thing that can top it this holiday season for me is either Let The Right One In or JCVD. Now how about that?

On another note, I’ll be back to full blogging capacity tomorrow, since the past few days in Real Life have caught up to me. I’m sorry, and I’m making each and every single one of you a sparkly friendship bracelet with matching plastic lanyard keychain.

In the meantime, be excellent to one another.

SCOTT – If you’re reading this, you need to e-mail me about the blogathon because I can’t pick, so I’m making you do it for me.   I suck, I know.   But I can’t find your e-mail anywhere.   I’m going off to cry sad tears, now, Scott….

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There is no question: M. Night Shyamalan must be stopped. He has to be saved…from himself.

Back in the day, I used to read the Fametracker message boards, before the moderators and posters had an epic all-out internet battle, and the posters on there would always forget how to spell Shyamalan’s name. Thus, he became “Shamalamadingdong”, and to this day, I can’t really look at his name without thinking, “Okay, Ding Dong, whatever, lay your next bad movie on me. Bring it on, sucker!”

There’s really no way, I don’t think, to give an accurate review of this movie without explaining what’s going on, so I’ve cut it below to save those of you who actually care the horror of being spoiled.

Elliot (Mark Wahlberg) is a mild-mannered high school science teacher who has a rapidly disintegrating marriage. He’s trying to keep it together, but then the news comes that terrorists have attacked Central Park with an unknown bioweapon. His school is dismissed quickly and he teams up with fellow math teacher Julian to get the hell out of the city before anything bad can happen to them.

What follows is the old survival story, where Elliot attempts to understand, process, manage and identify the problem and save himself, his wife and others.

Now, here be the spoilers.

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