I like Netflix. Scratch that, I love Netflix. Okay, so I spend more time with Netflix than I do some human beings. So sue me, they’ve got that nifty “Watch It Instantly” feature that I f’love. Don’t judge me.
My friends often ask for movie recommendations or do the thing I used to get when I worked at Blockbuster: “I’m looking for this movie and it has that dude from that TV show a while back with that chick from the one movie with the sword…” While they find my movie freakness amusing if strange, sometimes they are like, “Whoa, Caitlin, you lost me there.”
I told one of my friends that “if Netflix has a queue limit, I’ll be the first to find out”. (It’s 500 movies, incidentally.) One of the reasons I like having several friends that find my movie obsession a bit weird, but acceptable, is that they kind of rein me in at times. Upon looking at my Netflix queue, a friend exclaimed, “Are 473 movies REALLY NECESSARY, Caitlin?”
Of course, I was instantly on the defensive. “Of course it is!” I exclaimed. “I need to watch all of these! I mean, some of these I’ve been waiting to watch FOREVER. I’ve got the three at a time plan and I mail back a movie every day, I’ll get through it in no time!”
Ha! Famous last words, friends.
Upon deciding that my next ten movies in line held no interest at the moment for me recently, I started going through my queue to see what in the world was worth watching. Oh my god. WHAT WAS I THINKING.
I practically had the collected works of Ken Burns Netflixed. Seriously, self? There is NO WAY I could get through ten plus discs of Baseball, no matter how much I was interested in learning about the game even though I don’t even like baseball.
Then there were the movies that had been languishing in my queue for god knows how long that I had actually bought that I had never remembered were IN my queue.
My queue was sad enough to contain a Brittany Murphy movie. What? I hate her! What is that monstrosity in there?
This is why I need someone to intervene every so often and say, “Caitlin…just…stop.”
I’ve paired it down to an extraordinarily reasonable 405 movies, down from 500. Hey, I made all the changes I could, okay? Don’t ask me to give up Murder, She Wrote: Seasons 1 and 2. I love Angela Lansbury, especially as Jessica Fletcher. Those darn mysteries! She’s such a crack sleuth! I’m reliving my childhood! (Shut up.)
And there’s no way Animated Soviet Propaganda is coming out of my queue. Have I mentioned my Russophilia?
Nevermind the master works of Jean-Claude Van Damme there, either. Let’s pretend you never saw that, because if I had willingly put that in my queue, hypothetically speaking, it would be because a life without having seen Bloodsport is a life not yet lived. Or something like that.