In (Early) Celebration of Halloween

Like George Washington, I simply cannot tell a lie (ha!) and I really have to admit that if we’re not counting Christmas, Halloween is my favorite holiday.   As a kid it’s all about having a great costume and coming home with enough candy to give yourself diabetes just by looking at your haul.   As an [...]

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The Best Way To Illustrate One of the Many Reasons Why I Love Movies

If you haven’t seen The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, haul ass to Netflix and rent it.   It is, in my uninformed, completely low-brow opinion, one of the best movies ever made.
That’s one of my favorite scenes in the movie and I think it tells you a lot more about the story and the quality of the [...]

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#1477: The Stendhal Syndrome

Here’s where I get serious and also pose a question to you readers.

The Stendhal Syndrome is the story of Anna, an Italian policewoman who is hunting a serial rapist.   Anna has a somewhat serious problem:   she suffers from Stendhal Syndrome, a disorder that causes people to pass out upon viewing especially stirring and/or gorgeous works [...]

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The Best Movie Screening Of My Life

To every yin there is a yang, yes?
I was out of high school and vaguely kind of discovering what it was like to not be there.    A good friend of mine had run off to Los Angeles for a while to try his hand at acting and had come home to Texas with a handful [...]

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The Worst Movie Screening of My Life

Having reminisced fondly with a friend about this just the other day, I figured I’d write it down for posterity and all.
I like to give bad news first, so let’s start with the worst movie screening of my life.
I was in high school and Star Wars:  Episode II was opening.    On a dull Friday night, [...]

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REMINDER: Worst Movies Ever

You’ve only got a few days left to get in your nominees for Worst Movie Ever for me to review for the next Reader’s Choice that starts on November 1st.
I’m dutifully preparing by watching comfort movies well in advance (tonight?  Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure) to gear my mind up for the slew of awful [...]

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#1476: Gothic

In all actuality, I saw parts of Gothic when I was about twelve.

I felt conflicted on this one; on one hand, I hate the fact that it feels shoddily made and is…well…pretty crappy. However, my inner twelve year old screams at me: “But this is why you like Gabriel Byrne so much!”
12 [...]

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Hold Me!

This is the new poster for the My Bloody Valentine remake as found on EVERY SITE ON THE INTERNET, oh my god.   (I found it via Cinematical).
I’m torn here:   I like the throwback to cheesy movie posters of old.    On the other hand, this poster just screams “THIS MOVIE SUCKS”.   Nothing says date movie like [...]

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Movie Crack: Dracula 2000

I can think of no finer example of genuine movie crack than Dracula 2000.
It’s a godawful movie.   It hammers you over the head with the subtext; the idea of (spoiler!) Dracula originally being Judas Iscariot is nothing new; it takes characters from the original Bram Stoker novel and warps them beyond recognition.   It’s nothing new [...]

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Flashback: Varsity Blues

Was it necessary to make Friday Night Lights into a soap opera?
No.

I love how football movies set in Texas feel the need to portray Texans as knuckledragging, dumb as shit hicks who know nothing about life outside small towns other than the sweet, addictive lure of football, which consumes everyone’s lives and is all everyone [...]

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